The Gospel that Redeems Motherhood Guilt & Shame
“I can’t do this.”
“I feel like a terrible mom.”
“I can’t get this area right.”
Though I am not proud of it over the last few years of motherhood, those words have flown out of my mouth on more occasions than once. Many things contribute to motherhood guilt in this modern-day society. But the good news is that Christ came to redeem us from the weight and shame of motherhood guilt. The Collins Dictionary online says guilt is “an unhappy feeling that you have because you have done something wrong or think that you have done something wrong.”
Through my first year of motherhood, I didn’t realize that I was carrying a load of motherhood guilt from the time I gave birth until I started to enter the postpartum phase. Even through the process of giving birth, I remember having to rely on the Holy Spirit because I didn’t know if my body was working well enough as each hour grew past, leaving my body weary before delivering my baby. From the time a mother conceives, the enemy is plotting to download rapid lies through shame, guilt, and condemnation. If God frees us from guilt in every area of our lives, why does that become a struggle among the motherhood community? The weight of guilt can easily push us away from others, including our children. Guilt can often convince us that we are unworthy to exude the characteristics of the mother we envision we want to be in our hearts.
The resolve to overcoming mom guilt day in and day out is to be rooted in the foundation of Christ and abiding deeply in His word to direct us when we rather swaddle ourselves in a pool of motherhood guilt and shame. As we may be fearful to tell others how we respond to guilt in our homes, Jesus is ready to listen and respond to us on ways to overcome it. The circumstances that caused the guilt may not change, however, we have the opportunity to submit ourselves to the Father and walk in freedom through the power of the Holy Spirit. When guilt becomes our weakness, we can lean on Christ to be our strength.
“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me. So I take pleasure in weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and in difficulties, for the sake of Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:8-10
The Apostle Paul was writing in this scripture about boasting in Christ through his weakness. He recognized that he could not endure the suffering of the world without the power of Christ. As mothers, the guilt and shame we face point us to a story greater than our own. Our hearts may grow weary and when we fight sin each day because of our imperfections, we can trust in the hope of Jesus to anchor us and forgive us for our shortcomings.
Each time the weakness of our heart flows distasteful things out of our mouths towards our family; we can trust the power of Christ to help us forward instead of believing that shame and guilt have won over us. A compassionate and caring Father in Heaven is aware of the guilt and shame mothers carry. He is aware that we need His mercy to rescue us daily. And because He sent His son Jesus to die on the cross for our sins, shame, and guilt, we have a way of escape when we rather sink ourselves in the idea of being a terrible mom.
We can rest in being triumphant over terrible moms because of what Christ defeated on the cross. We can abide in His glory over guilt that saves us from each area in motherhood we struggle to get right. Christ redeems us from our brokenness as moms; we can boast in our weakness and welcome reliance on His strength.
“Therefore, let us approach the throne of grace with boldness, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in time of need.” Hebrews 4:16
This is a cross-posted blog written by Makayla on the Compassion For Moms and Makayla S. Harris sites.
